I have not journaled in a few days. I have gone through many phases of transformation through out my life's journey. This past year I have experienced many deaths and rebirths, many awarenesses that have occurred through activations and integration. I have released a lot of anger and frustration, have come to know more of what I want in my life and what I am here to do in service to a bigger cause outside of just myself. Realization of the foundation I have been building within myself, dissolving what was never me, what I create is built from a place of love. The foundation is solid. Knowing that I am worthy of having and doing all I want to do in life, not only calling in the experiences but allowing them in.
I used to keep asking, questioning and looking to others to figure out if facilitating healing was what I was "supposed" to do. I was looking for answers outside myself to tell me, when I was guiding myself the whole time. Even taking many practitioner trainings and certifications with those I consider to be an inspiration and that helped facilitate deep healing and transformation in my life. I still had some hesitation within myself and yet the last practitioner trainings I completed led me on a deeper journey within. There are many things that bring me joy that I have done and still do as far as what I create not only as a creative form of expression for myself, but for others. Healing energy manifests in many forms: visual arts, music, crystals, being in nature, connecting with each other, our spiritual practices, many healing art practices, and this is just a short list the Universe guides us to and through to show us it is possible to live a life you love with purpose, to help others remember this is possible. Our awareness to the very little things, the moments through out the day that give chills making our hearts feel alive, guide us to what is truly important individually and as a collective. The past few days I have had feelings of deep inner knowing of my path I had not felt before, no verbal response needed.
I was not even looking for signs specifically, then chills when hearing or reading something, flashes of awareness - it feels like a deep calling, I just feel it now. I do not know how this is all unfolding, but I believe and trust it is all unfolding beautifully - even the parts I had previously thought I could not possibly see as beautiful I Am realizing it is all beautiful. I feel at peace. I was not sure I would get to this space, the intensity of what I was experiencing, clearing, healing and activating - had me at times just wanting to give up. I had been praying & calling in a shift - so feeling at peace, I know I have come thru. I feel more love and gratitude for it ALL. I know now I can show up not just for myself but others.
I have been in a process of growing something beautiful and part of that is me growing thru healing some pretty deep wounds around self love, worthiness and trust. Finding more love and compassion for myself and the true ability to have this for others - this is the way through. There is no lying to Self. Coming back to Love thru the darkest moments. Part of the awareness I had the other day was that through out all of what I had been experiencing as pain, anger etc. - at the end of each day I still came back to love. This is and was an important awareness because at my core I Am Love - this is not just a mantra I repeat and tell myself, it is a deep knowing felt within. It's exciting to get to a place of trust, knowing I can show up in new ways for others by doing the deep inner work on myself. There is still so much unfolding. I have had new gifts activate this past year that opened me up so much, and with those gifts, showing me what I was holding on to that I have had to release, allow a change in my perception. Heart Innergetics name was created with the intention to connect with others through heart based connection, with love - this is our foundation. We offer activated crystals, create jewelry with love and offering energetic healing sessions. This recent transformation has also been heart healing, allowing me to truly be able to open up, be vulnerable with what I share and connect with others in new ways.
With Love and Gratitude.